I am very proud of my garden work in it every day next door comes over asking for things for there Garden all the time as they are unemployed I give it to them in reason they upset me this morning as they pointed out the weeds in it (not many got to really look) and theirs are full of them but I dont say any thing feel better now as I had a vent
greenforde,
Nov 7, 12:54pm
Just ignore their remarks some weeds are beneficial for the garden. Carry on and enjoy your garden.
samanya,
Nov 7, 12:54pm
I know the feeling! I have a neighbour (on 3 acres) & their garden is scruffy & they don't even bother to have a vege garden (I give them veges sometimes) & they have been there 18 yrs but they do keep their drive & hedge neat. the bits that people see! I have large garden & although not completely weed free it's well cared for. He came over recently & I had 2 clematis looking magnificent & not one word about those, but instead he commented that a third one , in the same patch looked dead! I'd transplanted it & left it hoping it might come away again . there must be a reason for these types to be so damned negative, but it does annoy, doesn't it.
woody89,
Nov 7, 1:01pm
I sometimes observe that success attracts negativity- can in fact be a sign that you're doing well! Lets face it, in this instance,weeds in a well kept garden are more noticeable than in wasteland.
docsportello,
Nov 7, 1:11pm
Some of the best gardens i've made have been when i've had no work. It takes quite an effort and attention to establish a garden. People come and look as say things like. "You don't seem unemployed. you look after this place like you own it. "
God NZders are thick. If you aren't a stereotype, it's YOU who's wrong, not their tiny minds. Apparently i should have been having 23 kids and cooking meth. They will never change. Morons.
piquant,
Nov 7, 2:06pm
It's the same when people open their gardens for viewing. It's interesting to overhear the comments people make. Just because it doesn't appeal to them, they are usually very cutting about design or placement of plants, or like yours - weeds. And I'll bet you a pound to a penny that their own gardens are of little significance, full of weeds and have no design concept at all. My own response would probably be something along the lines of - "Oh! I'm so sorry - it never occurred to me that it offended you so much. Maybe when yours is immaculate and full of the stuff you have grown yourself - I'll take note - until then I'd appreciate your keeping your negative thoughts to yourself." I have lots of weeds. I have friends who complain about them too. They mostly have piddling little gardens that their husbands do most of the work in. When you are by yourself, running a nursery, cooking, cleaning, mowing, painting, being a mechanic, builder and doing outside work as well, on a ten acre block with a big garden, there are going to be weeds! Everyone's circumstances are different - we can't all do what others can. I know I have slowed down a lot - but I'm not going to let them worry me - if they don't like how I live then they needn't visit.
crazynana,
Nov 7, 3:34pm
I always wonder at these sorts of people. Why do they think they have the right to comment about your garden or anything else. It is not their business. You can think what you like but there is no need to say rude things like this to someone. We are all different and have different things that we have to do, and sometimes we have to prioritise what we have time (or energy as we get older) to get done in the time we have available. Tell them if they are offended to not bother to look.
letitia,
Nov 7, 3:56pm
My reply would be something like: "I'd love it if you could give me a hand to keep it weed free in return for the bits and pieces I'm giving you."
samanya,
Nov 7, 4:18pm
My garden (approx 1 acre) is not open for garden visits, but I have a business operating from home so get quite a few people in & last weekend I showed about three lots around & fortunately, for them, they didn't make any adverse comments. I only offer if they seem genuinely interested. I know a few people who do open their gardens for fund raising 'garden tours' & I also know how very hard they work getting it as near perfect as they can.
samanya,
Nov 7, 5:22pm
Further to this post . I should add, to be fair, that these neighbours are really good people to live near, but I just couldn't help notice the negativity . I guess some people are just like that & probably don't mean to offend.
oh_hunnihunni,
Nov 7, 5:26pm
Jealousy.
piquant,
Nov 7, 5:47pm
That would be the obvious response - but many of us know, to our detriment, that often these types of people pull up the plants and leave the weeds! I don't know how many treasures I have lost this way. It may be well meaning but unless they know their plants, I'd rather have weeds in my garden thanks!.
punkinthefirst,
Nov 7, 6:16pm
Confound them with science. Learn the latin names for your weeds and say "Oh that's a lutea vulgaris" (I just made that up). or whatever.
kam04,
Nov 7, 6:38pm
We get a lot of good positive comments on our section/garden from both visitors and people walking past, including neighbours. Makes us feel all the hard work and effort we put in has been well worth it. In fact some neighbours have said jokingly 'will you stop making your place look so nice, it's putting ours to shame' :-)
calista,
Nov 7, 6:38pm
Actually you don't even need to learn the correct Latin name - make one up - chances are they won't know the difference anyway.
samanya,
Nov 7, 7:29pm
*likes* To take that a step further, if someone points out a weed, why not say you are growing it for medicinal purposes . a brew to help whatever ails you?
lythande1,
Nov 8, 7:50am
[quote=zeta7 next door comes over asking for things . they pointed out the weeds in it [/quote] And the other problem with NZ people is they don't ever say anything. Point out you might have a few less weeds if they kept their side under control. I get that, neighbours do nothing with their weed infested jungle so I am constantly weeding out privet, oxalis, wandering jew, woolly nightshade, ivy, ladder fern. the lot.
And stop giving them stuff.
jan2242,
Nov 8, 11:05am
I call my weeds, my wildflower garden!
kay34,
Nov 8, 8:09pm
OR< the great area of ground cover is what mine is known as!
les6,
Nov 9, 6:48am
part of the joy of having your own house and section,bought and paid for.You can do what you like when you like.People can be horrified with what they find or se at my place but thats it. my place!if I want to bang a 4 inch nail into the wall to hang a picture on I will,and if the lawns dont get done this week they can wait till next.
eljayv,
Nov 9, 8:15am
In winter when our summer vege garden is “resting†I whinge about the weeds and am informed it is ground cover protecting the soil. I guess you see what you want to see
brightlights60,
Nov 9, 9:49am
I think its just people being negative in general. I remember family members who would call in and only see the things we hadn't done in 20 years of renovating the house, rather than the huge improvements we had done. Its nice at the end of the day to omit these people from your life and just surround yourself with positive people. If you can't, when someone makes a comment like that, smile and say "yes, but look at this!" and point out the good things they appear to have missed.
eljayv,
Nov 9, 1:16pm
Smart! We all chase approval too much and the opinions of some people aren’t worth a tin of fish.
venna2,
Nov 9, 1:21pm
"Sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me". It's kind of you to give plants away to these pesky neighbours. Maybe they feel a bit inferior and are pointing out these near-invisible weeds to boost their own self-esteem. It's up to you whether you continue to give them plants. I think that if I were you, I'd kindly suggest that they pull out their own weeds!
quane1,
Nov 29, 10:55pm
Weeds are only plants that are in the wrong place.
Since the public registrations are closed, you must have an invite from a current member to be able to register and post in this thread.
Have an account? Login here.