Here is one from a client: A new guy takes over a kitset garage business and goes out & assembles his first garage no worries. The next morning after a heavy downpour, the new guy finds the client on his doorstep waiting for doors to open saying the water is flooding in thru the walls. Turns out the galvanized wheatherboards were installed upside down & rain water was funneling in at high speed!
crackerjack19,
Apr 27, 11:03pm
At a time when I was seriously employed I had to investigate a Ramset nail that had come in through the office window from the construction site across the road. The amazing thing to me was that the nail wasnt even bent and was not tumbling as it came through the window,it had also travelled about 50 metres.This was from one of the'free flight'guns not one of the piston driven kind.
shiyo,
Apr 27, 11:30pm
dont leave cans of that expanding foam in the car on a hot summers day. They exploded and the hatch back ended up with foam stuck hard everywhere. And nothing will move it.What a mess. lucky it was the old car! years later it is still got an interior stucco look.
pc_nut,
Apr 28, 4:21am
447 OMG rotflol sorry but that is the funniest thing i've ever heard of in my life. how much foam was there! at least the foam would add a bit of buoyancy to said car
poolgirl6,
Apr 28, 5:23am
bumping Too funny to get lost down here
shiyo,
Apr 28, 5:08pm
I think it was 2 cans, but there was more in there that stuff just goes for miles. Daughter had borrowed dads little car and her hubby is a builder. Boy did they feel bad. We ended up replacing the rear hatchbecause the window was covered and spent hours scraping the other windows and then brought car seat covers,I laughed, she cried.
zoopa,
Apr 28, 8:56pm
isn't there about 4 - 6 liters of foam per can! haha. Bugger. Actually, it would be interesting to put one on a fence post and shoot it with a good air rifle. Not near the annoying next door neighbors property of course. lol
tarn35,
Apr 28, 11:07pm
Don't check the oil in the motor mower while it is running and your eye is up close to the hole when you pull out the dipstick.duh
chevcamaro,
Apr 29, 10:38pm
that was funny
heoj,
May 1, 5:17am
lessons my ex will never learn from 1a.dont spend the grocery money onexterior paint, beer and smokes before checking if she has bought the weeks groceries for 6 first.1b. dont store the paint in the shed and rest the buckets on sharp gravel. no food and no paint. grumpy family.1cwhen everyone tells you the paint colour sample for the windows looks like s### brown dont ignore and buy that colour anyway.only ten years of s### brown windows til repainting time.2.after the grocery incident dont repeat mistake by buying not quite enough discontinued tiles in the wrong colour because they were cheap and we will be needing them in 2 years.dont buy tiles that are wall tiles to use on bathroom and laundry floor 3. when mil gives son an electric sander dont assume its ok to sand window back to wood without emptying the room. coated bed and linen and clothes in drawers and wardrobe in dust.only took a week to clean up the mess and wash everything
jules.,
May 1, 7:50pm
oh my goodness heoj, when will the devorce be settled! bahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa
heoj,
May 1, 10:31pm
lesson he might learn from when you find a stick of explosive in 1950s cake tin in the roof and its leaking do you 1. ring the army or fire brigade for advice, or 2. bury tin in vegie garden 30cm deep, 1 metre from house.i just cant wait for new girlfriend to clean that mess up.if she is lucky it will blow up tool shed and that will cure his diy
peanuts,
May 1, 11:27pm
When buying patty cases and always on the lookout for a bargain, do choose the more expensive box with less in it. Or you end up with heaps of really small patty cases which don't even 1/2 fill your patty tin spaces. Anyone got ideas for about 100 very small patty cases.LOL
goldlands,
May 2, 1:10am
Guess what A 60 kg geriatric (even a very fit one)cannot roll a round bale of wrapped silage. she cant tow 34 of them either , not without stuffing the clutch plate in her late Husband,s pride and joy,new Hilux
heathermary,
May 2, 1:15am
Daughter employed a Student Job Search guy to do some gardening - yes, yes, he knew about Horticulture. He arrived wearing smart trousers, white shoes and a snazzy Fair Isle knitted vest. Could he dig out some stumps please! A few ineffectual pats at the soil with the spade made it clear that stump digging was not his forte. Perhaps pulling out weeds might be his forte. no, no, you need to pull out the roots as well not just pull off the tops. Well, there are some herbs to be planted - no, no, the plants have to go into the ground so they are at soil level not sitting on top. As he left he asked if he could go and look at the lake. I pointed out the walkway down to the beach - I wonder if he noticed that the water in the lake seemed to be very low - perhaps he walked out to the water's edge to admire the lake - if he did he would have been thigh deep in mud and would have ruined his elegant attire.
masturbidder,
May 2, 1:47am
Before doing a '5-minute' electrical repair remember to draw a sketch of the original wiring. Otherwise it can turn into a whole-day job, or even a chuck-it-away-and-and-buy-a-ne- w-one job!
gingerlime,
May 2, 2:00am
ooh buggha goldlands I guess even a highlux has its' limits.
s.patete,
May 2, 11:11pm
When cleaning out fire its always a good idea to make sure embers are completely out before filling up plastic bag and placing in garage to await rubbish day,Said embers heat up, melt plastic bag which in turn catches fire and burns down said garage. Happened to friends of the olds quite a while ago, now I have my own fires embers go in coal bucket for a few days, although thinking about it now I could do with new garage lol
workingman1,
May 2, 11:15pm
Dont assume that the green can that you picked up & shook well to spray the rose bush foraphids is just that, also thinking you have over shaken the can as it foams up on leaves only to then examine the can when the job is completed to find in fact it is an identical colour can to the Mr Muscle oven cleaner. One good thing is that it does indeed kill the aphids & you will not haft to worry about aphids ever again as needless to say you wont have a rose bush.
hazelnut2,
May 3, 12:32am
When trimming off a big overhanging branch make sure your ladder is at least 1 metre taller than the current height of the branch and TIED to it too, otherwise when the weight of the overhanging bit is cut off, your ladder will suddenly be TOO SHORT as the branch has sprung up to its original positon!Your ladder will no longer reach and you will fall 5 metres to the ground and crack your pelvis and be in hospital and suffer a lot for MONTHS! Especially if you are over 70!
pc_nut,
May 3, 10:52am
bumper bump up
hezwez,
May 3, 2:59pm
Peanuts #457 I think you may have bought the box for truffles, lol
maximus56,
May 3, 4:03pm
I wasn't there but my brother told me about something that happened to him. His mother in law was coming from the uk to visit so he decided to plaster a feature wall in the lounge. He'd been doing it most of the morning and stood back to admire it. His son got in a mood with him for whatever reason and went out the front door and slammed it so hard that the plaster started slipping down the wall. The funniest thing was that he tried to stop it. He scraped it all off in the end. He never told me what he said to his son though.
majoba,
May 3, 6:55pm
#785 and if you ignore above advice don't put the embers on a wooden verandah or deck either. Sister did it in 1956 and daughter did same thing 44 years later. My mother never forgave my father either for putting out the fire in our house which was a wreck.
heoj,
May 3, 9:52pm
most laughs i have had in ages laughed all friday night.please keep adding
Since the public registrations are closed, you must have an invite from a current member to be able to register and post in this thread.
Have an account? Login here.